the Geeks WERE Right.

Oh the Faint. You are possibly the only band that can make me dance with almost no inhibitions. It's doubtful that anyone will believe that but it's true. I do not understand your choice of openers nor Todd in general but I had so much fun.

I arrived at the Vic last night halfway through the first band's set to find the show was sold out. Thankfully a bit of foresight meant that my ticket was patiently awaiting me at Will Call. After purchasing Blank Wave Arcade on vinyl and a beer (because I didn't pay for my original copy and because I'm halfway to 50 respectively) I entered the venue proper. Perhaps I am too old for such shenanigans but with only a wee bit of maneuvering I was able to make my way to the front row.

The first band was intense. I imagine that during the selection process Dapose calmly put his hands on his hips and laid down the law (because even though he's in the Faint he's really very metal*). Thus Genghis Tron got the spot as the first opener. Like so many other bands, I've heard of, but not actually listened to, Genghis Tron. They are very loud. I've read about bands producing a wall of sound in books that lay out the history of punk rock but now I finally understand what that means. The air was actually vibrating. Thank goodness for earplugs and being old enough to be sensible enough to use them.

The second band was the worst band ever. Ok, not really. According to Wikipedia, Jaguar Love is "an American art punk band from Portland, comprised of former members of The Blood Brothers and Pretty Girls Make Graves." Some bands seem destined to play basement parties and cramped, smoky bars all their lives and other bands are obviously headed for bigger (though not necessarily better things). Sometimes the difference has more to do with presence than talent. Jaguar Love is the second sort of band, more suited to a small arena tour than opening at the Vic. To be fair, they are clearly very talented and had so much energy and enthusiasm that I felt really bad for not liking them more. It just wasn't my thing.

After the longest set break ever (seriously, the techs spent maybe ten minutes running wires and setting up two keyboards then the stage was deserted for at least 25 min.) the Faint came on. A visual aid is required



because that is how Todd was dressed. It.was.AWESOME. And then he rocked out the whole show in his mad scientist getup (fully buttoned lab coat, big rubber goggles, maniacal twinkle). And I danced because you can't NOT dance to the Faint. Seriously. They played an amazing set and buttered up the crowd by declaring us the best audience ever.

In short order the band worked their way through all their usual crowd pleasing numbers including Hospital and a surprisingly small amount of new tracks. I have a set list because I'm a dork and a few grainy camera phone shots of Joel and Todd (everyone else was way too far away to even bother attempting to capture). Despite the fact that they play dancey-dancey-indie-rock I'm always surprised by how well they actually..er...dance hampered by their instruments.

Even the new songs were awesome and well received.

Confession: I have not spent much time listening to Faciinatiion. The Faint self-released it a couple of weeks ago and it's in a stack of CDs somewhere that I've been meaning to get to when my current Itunes library stops sidetracking me. I'm being sabotaged, for real.

Anyway, my concern was that if not on Saddle Creek their sound may have changed. And I liked them as they were. I think I read somewhere that the choice to not use Saddle Creek was largely financial (digital rights or something, don't quote me) so it shouldn't have been indicative of quality. But then I read several modest and reserved reviews of the album and despite knowing better I began growing apprehensive. Silly me.

End digression. So the show was easily the best I've seen them do and I've seen them four or five times now. Stage banter was kept to a minimum to enable maximum performance time and ease song transitions. I cannot say enough good things about it.

The only bad thing was that security sucked because they were completely ineffective. They got in the way of other participants' dancing and didn't stop the underage drinkers near me. Furthermore, they didn't keep people from crowd surfing (and kicking others in the head) or from jumping on and off stage. What's worse, the one attempt to capture and evict a stage dancer resulted in a massive security man jumping into the audience and knocking over the waif of a girl next to me. What the fuck. He didn't even attempt to help her up (I did, though) despite her being completely sprawled out on the floor in the middle of a pit of dancing. Asshole.

Afterwards, completely sweaty and happy as a clam, I met up with Sarah-Sarah on the Clark bus and we journeyed to the Smartbar to see the Faint do a DJ set (Jacob with assistance from Todd, specifically). He was very good. Because unlike some celebrity DJs he wasn't just running an Itunes playlist. Which is a valid option and can be enjoyable but still). It seemed as though he had pre-created original tracks to mix as he went. So I drank whiskey (best drink special ever) and danced some more. And then an old man started dancing with me but fortunately Sarah-Sarah acted the part of knight errant. And we made it home around 4ish after hitting Taco Hell which is a story for another day. (Key words: hat, primary colors, arts, physics, raspberry iced tea, Son Ambulance).

It was a very nice evening.

*Dapose has a side project called Vverevvolf Grehv (I think it's pronounced Wherewolf Grave-? IDK). It's very kitten core. You'll see what I mean, but I imagine fluffy white cats the world round love these sorts of bands and sing along as though it were a Meow Mix commercial.

**Joel Petersen also has another band which I enjoy a lot. Broken Spindles played Chicago a few months ago and he gave me a button. I have a review of that show to post up later. He seems as focused but more relaxed in the Faint.

Queen of the Surface Streets

Stuff I am into recently for no conceivable reason:

1.

Vitamin Water. I know it's ridiculous. I totally get that. "Brought to you by the center for responsible hydration." Gag me. But it's so compelling! The bright colors, the variety, the snappy little blurbs (I'd love a job writing the snappy blurbs...where do I apply for that? Is that on Craigslist?) Maybe it's a conspiracy. Real water is probably the best choice but I feel dumb paying for it (Evian is just Naive backwards, afterall) so I've been tricked into buying this instead.

At least it's not caffeinated.

2.

"Jacked Up." As a phrase. There wasn't really a good illustration of "jacked up" that didn't involve monster trucks or British teeth. But this picture of Tilly and the Wall works because it is sort of jacked up. I love Tilly and the Wall and they are all super nice in real life! But their dead on stares here creep me out. And once I noticed the hand it was all I could stare at.

Note that I don't use "jacked up" aloud. That would be too ridiculous.

3. Finding chalk on the street. Ah summer!

Went to the Moon in a Soda Can

I forgot how much I love(d) the Exploding Dog comics. I used to show them to people who then wouldn't laugh. Whatever, I thought they were funny. Also A Softer World, which I cannot plug enough. Sorry. But anyway. Here's a preview of Exploding Dog:


if it were worth fixing, it wouldn't break


ambiguities are all we have


it was my birthday (this was posted 8/2/04...which was also MY birthday!)

These two comic strip series are like my test for people. It's like in the Little Prince, do you see the hat or the elephant? Because that is how I will discuss things with you from then on. Bonus points for getting the reference.

Such a dork.

What happened to your politics?

"No man, it's like, it's just...I got kind of...distracted."





Ok, so the robot thing. Right? I think I promised that. I hear the most ridiculous comments at work and I'm beginning to hate the elderly. However, I really really hate people who bitch about being transferred to India for tech support or whatever. Sometimes they're totally apologetic about it which makes it worse and not any more acceptable. Sometimes the rep joins in and I just want to hit them. What the fuck? And some customers who apparently have no filter between their brain an their mouth (or just have no soul) start complaining about foreigners who "steal" American jobs.

Excuse me? Did you really just say that? Really really?! I think like 97% of people who bitch about this sort of thing to the operator wouldn't take whatever job they supposedly lost out on even if they were paid to do it (which, you know, they would have been). I'm just saying, mr. bitchy customer, if you want to sit on the phone for nine hours a day at $12/hr for a company you purportedly hate then, y'know, AT&T is probably hiring somewhere. Have at it. And then you can put up with the assholes like you used to be (because seriously, I don't think that after listening to customers' insanity for even just a day customer service reps ever give anyone lip on the phone again).

But all of this pales in comparison to what I learned the other day. AT&T (and so probably a lot of other companies) employ ROBOTS to process their mail.

Huh?

No, really, I asked my boss and he confirmed it. So when you send a check to your phone company to keep your service from getting shut off, a ROBOT is judging your handwriting and laughing at you for misspelling forty dollars and eighty nine cents.

Furthermore, nobody ever complains about ROBOTS stealing their jobs. But clearly, CLEARLY this is a major problem! So instead of building a wall between the US and Mexico which everyone knows is pointless anyway, we should be building a wall to keep the ROBOTS out. Because I've seen enough movies to know that shit never ends well.

I am completely serious about this.

ROBOTS.

One for the Shareholders

So I don't know if you have ever found yourself in this position but I have unwittingly become witness to a tragic triangle of love. It would be awkward if it weren't so exciting.

Our cast:




(not their real pictures but close enough)

Here are the facts:

Sarah Jane-looks vaguely like Sarah Jessica Parker in real life. She shows up at the bus stop first having sold her Toyota Prius as part of a New Year's resolution. On stressful days she's running to make it as the bus pulls up. Either way she waits until she's seated and en route to do her makeup. This is how I know that she's not coming from her place. She majored in Comparative Lit at U of M (a lifetime ago-her words) and now works as a Realtor.

James-(doesn't really look like the dad from Gossip Girl) An aging hipster type. Coming from the same direction, he usually shows up a couple minutes after Sarah Jane, parking his Mini Cooper illegally to run into the Starbucks around the corner for his morning coffee (black with two packets of Splenda I suspect). He's the sort of person who's forever out of coffee filters which conveniently gives him an excuse to see Sarah Jane one last time before heading off to teach at Columbia College.


That's what I can tell just by looking at them. After extended observation I've also concluded:

-Sarah Jane sold James his condo. This is how they originally met. It's where they stay during the week (they rarely meet on the weekends, her decision, unless its at a laundromat in her neighborhood). She actually sabotaged the original closing for reasons she can't explain. Sarah Jane would never EVER refer to anything as fate. However, after three years she is ambivalent about the apartment.

-Even though James loves music (mostly old Dischord stuff and secretly the new Panic at the Disco album) they only listen to NPR together. Sarah Jane will never admit she hates This American Life. James listens to Click and Clack only out of habit.

-James has never had chicken pox. Sarah Jane has a scar on the back of her right calf just below the knee. She thinks no one has ever seen it but she is wrong. James often finds himself drawing it in constellations at work.

-Except for the Velvet Underground box set (for Sarah Jane) and a pair of reindeer socks (for James to wear to his uncle's funeral) they don't exchange gifts even after three years. He went to a wedding with her once for her college roommate. It was the only time they've ever fought.

-Sarah Jane secretly dreams of having kids. Usually fraternal twins. She blames this on being an only child. On the days when the longing is particularly bad she cancels on James and watches terrible movies like The Jane Austin Book Club. She hates these movies with an unrivaled passion. Watching them is her way of punishing herself.

-James watches four hours of the Weather Channel on the weekends. He doesn't dream of traveling anywhere. Two months after he graduated from college he woke up in Tulsa, OK with a guitar and two pairs of jeans in a back pack. He has no recollection of how he got there and left two hours later on a bus to Chicago. He now owns 2743 CDs and 432 records.

-James also loves to dance. Sarah Jane likes Wii Bowling.

-On the Wednesday nights James and Sarah Jane watch Fraggle Rock clips on Youtube and play Gin Rummy until 1 am. It's the best night of the week.


The plot thickens:


Bianca-James' serious girlfriend. Currently pursuing a masters degree at his alma matter (University of Texas at Austin). They met at some pretentious film screening at SXSW six years ago. She doesn't understand why James hasn't proposed yet and has no clue about Sarah Jane. Despite her hopes and dreams they'll never get married because he's never going to grow up.

True story, she was in town last weekend, I saw them together at Ikea. Awkward! This is how I know that she exists and that I'm not making this stuff up even if nobody else believes me. I was right about the Ace of Cakes thing and I am right about this!



Ok, and for real the robot thing tomorrow.

What's the buzz...

So we have the fancy cable which affords us the privilege of access to Comcast's On Demand menu. Recently in the free movies section they've had "Jesus Christ Superstar" and I finally had time to sit down and rewatch it.

That's right, I said REwatch.

I love this movie* although maybe not for the obvious reasons. Ok, actually it's probably pretty obvious given that most people who know me would probably not choose "religious" as an accurate adjective while describing me to strangers. I've been trying to explain my fascination with the film to my roommate but I just get blank stares.**

Despite its title and protagonist I think the movie JCS is really more about how my parent's generation saw themselves and the world they were living in. Briefly, peaceful martyrs isolated in a metaphorical wasteland that was controlled by multiple factions (some incompetent others too constrained by tradition and fear to effect any real change) and surrounded by peers obsessed with consumerism. Additional anti-military sentiment is fairly obvious as well.

The interesting thing, I think, is how the movie seems to comment on the futility of the peace and love generation's efforts. Like Titanic, everyone knows how this story ends. Jesus dies. And despite what you may personally believe, in the film that's it. Run credits. Additionally, there's a ton of angst over "selling out," if you will, and while it doesn't end well in either case at the time it seems right and almost justified. (Judas thinking he can change things from inside the belly of the beast, Thomas avoiding possible arrest so he can continue to the fight later).

Equally important, no real alternative in either case is proposed. The message seems to be that either you die young or you eventually grow up, betray what was important to you relatively easily and then with only moderate nostalgia, you move on (at the end, reboarding the bus, only a few characters turn to look back at the cross and nobody stays behind).

So despite the poppy, over the top dance routines, the movie is actually pretty bleak.

I also love the anachronisms for their own sake (machine guns, tanks, tank tops). IDK, that stuff always makes me smile. But the icing on the cake has to be the wardrobe (seriously, those pants!) and facial hair. Oh my goodness scruffy hippies. I just want to move into a tepee in the back yard with you. If I had a back yard. Because you seem fun and artistically grimy (still smelly but maybe not like death or urine).

It was hard to find pictures for the unenlightened so I'm including a couple of Youtube videos. Try to enjoy.







I also went to Ikea over the weekend. More about that and robots in my next post.

*To clarify, I'm talking specifically about the movie version of Jesus Christ Superstar made in 1973 based upon the Broadway play. I have no interest in the theater version or any subsequent movie remake that may be happening in the future.

**Despite looking vaguely like a smash-up of the Two Gallants, in JCS Jesus is pretty freaking emo. In the fifteen year old sort of way. So minus half a star for that.

Transister Radio

Oh M Ward. You are so awesome. It is no wonder Zooey Deschanel teamed up with you. I would probably steal your voice like the witch in Disney's version of the Little Mermaid* and let it sing me to sleep every night. That's maybe creepier than I intended it to be. Also, I have an Ipod so it's probably not strictly necessary.

She and Him were pretty amazing despite some serious sound issues. Zooey is cute as a button but oh M Ward, the way you rend music from your guitar. Alas.

It's probably time for sleep.

*I finally found a copy of my preferred version of the Little Mermaid based upon the Hans Christian Anderson story. It's a bit darker than Disney's.

**Because I spend two hours a month listening to their work I've come to have some favorite Chicago poets. Currently I have the following poem by Toni Asante Lightfoot stuck in my head (she makes everything sound dirty when she reads which makes me blush and hover over the mute button at the radio station). I don't know the title but it's very clever.

He.
He used to lick.
He used to lick my face.
He used to lick my face, I thought it sweet.
He used to lick my face, I thought it sweet to him.
He used to lick my face, I thought it sweet. To him I was a sucker.

At the Bottom of Everything

This week owned me, it kicked my ass in every imaginable way. It was very sad for all involved. And now it's over. So maybe karma can cut me a break?

How did my week suck? Let me count the ways:
1. Work. My cube assignment was moved into uncharted territory, far from the people who have made Monday through Friday bearable. It takes me about three months to fully warm up to new people and I only have two months left. I imagine that everyone around me thinks I'm weird which is unfair because I am clearly the normal one. Also the keyboard was filthy! I felt like Monk cleaning it out. Gross.

2. Arienette. Some jackass-douchebag-motherfucker stole my bike's back wheel. What the fuck?! Really?! What the hell are you going to do with a tire? I've been imagining revenge scenarios since Wednesday. I am not a forgiving person. Especially considering that it's going to cost me around $130 to replace the damned thing. That's twice what I originally paid for the thing! Not cool. Part of the issue is keeping it as a fixed gear/non-coasting bike.

Side note: I know this is probably a ridiculous thing to do. Culturally, I mean. But like the author of Stuff White People Like, I can't seem to help myself. It's kind of like driving a stick shift car, more control and more fun. And since I'd pay later to change it back, I might as well get it done right the first time. Provided the shop I took it to can figure out the logistics. I sort of suspect it's a drug front.

3. Fortunately I found a reduced price Saturday ticket to Lollapalooza. I didn't really plan to go at all this year since $80/day seems steep to pay for an event. (I understand the arguments of dividing per band you see, etc but it's still $80 down). Also I don't really like festivals since I end up hot and gross feeling, dislike portapotties and get sunburned just thinking about no cloud coverage. However, it's my birthday weekend and I have a boatload of SPF 50 leftover from Pitchfork.

The urge to see CSS, creative budgeting and the desire to have a Friday off work tempted me to get a Friday ticket as well. Even after the bike incident of '08 I thought I could maybe swing the entrance fee. Of course, I made my final decision at 2:30 am Friday after going out Thursday night. By which time tickets were sold out. I blame Radiohead.

4. All the little things you don't think about that go wrong on an every day basis but suddenly develop significance when larger things fuck up. Examples: missing the bus, losing newly purchased items, late payment charges, sudden shift to genuinely hot/humid summer weather that I dislike, etc.

5. Deleted for personal reasons.

6. Missing the vast majority of Shark Week because I didn't realize it was happening. Fortunately we have On Demand and I caught parts of the Top 10 Deadliest Sharks, How to Not Get Bit, Dirty Jobs: Greenland something Shark.


*The (Liz) Lemon Shark-My New Favorite

I feel like there was something else but I forget. I know this is all very whiny. IDC.

Today ought to be better. Devotchka, Okkervil River, Wilco and Mason Jennings for sure. Probably some other stuff. We'll just have to wait and see.

Indeed!

P.S. I have been listening to the new Black Kids album all week and wish to amend any prior statements I may have made. It is awesome! Especially the song Love Me Already. I really like how the music mirrors the lyrics. Also the new Conor Oberst song Danny Callahan is also fun and awesome.